Wednesday, April 08, 2009

The Ridiculously Priced Table Collection, by Ralph Lauren

Just in time for spring, and the recession.

Tables designed by Ralph ...
Pricing inspired by Retarded ...
the status is yours to keep....

we present the so-ridiculously-priced-you-have-to-blog-about-it table collection, by that most trusted name in aspirational American assimilation....

Our first item, we have a slab of brown wood over this-better-not-be-aluminum-we-payed-too-much-for-it-dahling. Lamp, reading material not included. Price: $17,000

Next up, for our young starter-home bargain-shoppers, we have your grandmother's dining room table. Just as you remember it, fresh and gleaming after a recent Pledge™ job. Price: $14,085

Finally, we have glass -- that's right, glass! -- over those hopefully-not-so-aluminum sawhorse legs you saw earlier. Redundancy is an underrated feature in a collection like this. Price: $16,395


  1. Anonymous4/08/2009

    I wouldn't mind having that third table in my house. It's beautiful. If you're a writer working from home can you write it off for taxes?

  2. I wonder if there's a recording of Ralph laughing maniacally bwooohahahaha when you click "Place your order". That'd be worth it.

  3. Anonymous4/09/2009

    how much you think they'd cost if we weren't in a recession?

  4. Anonymous4/23/2009

    hmmm that first table looks quite familiar!! (wink)


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