Dear TAN: White Girlfriends And The Seeds of Discontent

I once started a neverending interview, but now we're switching to a "Dear TAN" feature. Send your questions/letters to theassimilatednegro [at] gmail [dot] com.

In this edition: White Girlfriend Ressentiment! (ressentiment is a word, perhaps, we could use more often?)

Dear TAN,

I hope your February isn't too cold! (You know how we don't like the cold.) [ed. note: yes this is old, d'oh!] I thought I'd drop you a line, soliciting some insight from a fellow partially assimilated negro.

I'm beginning to see feelings of resentment growing in my soul against my white girlfriend.

But I think it's more disdain for the white privilege from which she comes and its manifestations in her life.

Bemusedly,

DPW

~~

Dear Redacted,

Ahh, that old canard of caucasian coquettes and their craved kunta-kintes ... I know it well, my friend. Unfortunately, for your questions, easy answers there are none. A road map to Racial, Peaceofmind there is not, young jedi-negro. All I can tell you is where the hot hipster chicks hang out so you can get a new one.

But firstly we should confirm what we do know: White Privilege has everything to do with feelings about your White Girlfriend. Thats why we're using capital letters. If you're still wondering about that I'd say you should just reference her as "White Girlfriend" for a week or so, just for conditioning purposes. I mean what's the point of having one if you're not going to remember what she is, knahmean?

Moving on ... in the setup for your letter, I use the word "ressentiment," and that's not just my hip hop spelling of resentment. As the wise wiki above tells us they're two related but distinct terms, and I think very relevant to us assimilateds trying to manage the white angst (wangst?) dilemma.

Since I prefer to spit my Nietzsche to fine mamacitas in the wee hours over wine I won't really get into it now *cough* but Friedrich has a lot of real talk for black folk. And the long and short is ressentiment is about creating an object and subsequent morality out of being poorly treated. In the wiki they use a quote about birds of prey and lambs saying birds of prey may pick on the lambs, but it doesn't mean they dislike or hate the lambs, in fact quite the opposite, they think they're delicious. Meanwhile the lambs are sort of like F these birds, birds suck, we should get organized and start a F Birds revolution. This psychology is seen often with the black/white stuff because smart black people are always wringing their hands over whether we should be hating on The Man and engaging in the resistance, or seeing a brighter side etc. It translates well with the White Girlfriend issue because the White Girlfriend is more ostensibly not an enemy. Their weapons are fair-skin, blowjobs and cashmere vaginas (actually I think all girls have the latter two) so what's to revolt against ....?

Anywhite, I don't know if this helps you at all, but if you babble about this to your White Girlfriend she probably won't know what you're talking about, and you'll feel superior, and then maybe oral sex will ensue, and voila: no more resentment. The ressentiment might remain though.

Good luck!

-TAN