Friday, May 27, 2011

Overcompensating at the Condom Factory

(Even post-rapture the lord continues to forsake me when I'm drunk. and has yet to weigh in on the proper size of condoms)


From the BBC:
"A survey of more than 1,000 men in India has concluded that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men."

awwww. Gives a whole new meaning to "Slumdog Millionaire", doesn't it? Oh wait, actually it doesn't do that at all.

It does mean, though, that the "majority of Indian men" don't have enough burger for comely Indian-American model/meat-eater Padma Lakshmi.

AnyHardee, yeah, maybe that's not true either, but it turns out getting the specs on these "condoms" the kids are all raving about is a tricky business. In India they're too small, but over in South Africa, *cough*, they have a different problem. All of this is racist, but apparently true!

Also, it makes me think that maybe average-size isn't so bad. Also also reminds me of that poem, "footprints in the sand". I had a similar experience, you see, where I dreamed of walking the beach with the Lord, and all the love-scenes from my life flash across the sky, and I notice footprints, sometimes one pair, sometimes two. And seeing that saddened me because I noticed that I'd see two footprints when i was sober, or when i had a girlfriend, but whenever I'd get drunk and out of control i'd only see one. And I asked the Lord, "why do you forsake me when I'm drunk??! that's when i need you most" And he/she replied, "it's true, I do get the f out of dodge when you get drunk. You're sort of an insufferable knowitall. But look again at the sand, because when I leave you i give you a little extra to work with in my absence."

footsteps image: via


  1. Laura T.4/23/2009

    Wow. You posted it. I should have thought ahead. It's bad enough that it might be true, but perhaps worse that now millions (how many peeps peep your page, anyway?) will have it as fodder for joke mill. I guess if it's already on the BBC, the damage is largely done. Though, you probably have a different audience, and one maybe more prone to making jokes about penis size. You have any E. Indian male friends to chat with about this?

  2. i did go the easy route. but if you have an informed person on the subject I'll gladly update or do another post.

  3. I might never go to Hardees, but I could watch that Padma Lakshmi commercial over and over again. Never been so tempted to go back to eating meat.

  4. Seems to me dragging like that, especially while drunk in sand, might present some significant discomfort in the morning. Sand are tiny bits of glass, right?

  5. Anonymous4/24/2009

    not to be critical or anything, but that line does seem to be pretty narrow, doesn't it?

  6. this is why I say get Married!! You don't have to worry about any sizes it always fits!

  7. Not to be picky, but if you're excited wouldn't it be more "sun salutation" than leaving marks in the sand?


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