Wednesday, December 26, 2007

If It's Bad For This Dude, Then I Am Definitely Sh*t Out Of Luck

So this research programmer scientist dude does some math to figure out the pool of eligible smart, beautiful women for him to date/wife-up is 18, 726. This is in the world. Now this is an old link, he made the calculations circa 2000, so figure on population growth alone he's at least up to 20,000. I'm also presuming this is a white guy cause I'm pretty sure there were no black research/programmer/scientist dudes online before 2000. Could be Asian, but his name is Tristan Miller.

So if I start with his dating pool of 20K. Then for me as a black guy we have to cut that in half to account for all the white chicks who don't date black guys. So we have 10,000. Then we have to cut it in half again for the black chicks who won't date a black guy who would date the white girls who do go out with him. So now we're at 5,000. Then lop off another 50% for all assorted chicks who won't touch a guy willing to byline as "The Assimilated Negro." Now we're at 2,500. Blogger, 1,250. Penis-size, 625. Misogynist, 312.5 (that half is a she-male). Figure I've dated 100 girls, and they've all passed... so looks like I'm left with 212 girls and a she-male to try out in the next 50 years of my life or so. And I haven't even gotten into Mets-hating Yankee fans, alcoholism, or my other personal personality quirks, all of which suck.

So yeah, it's not looking good. Might as well cut to the chase and bring on the she-male to see if we get along.

(she-males: please don't e-male me to complain about me being a transgenderist or transvestitist or whatever .... I get it, you'll pass too. Thanks.)

cheers!

via: NYTimes Laughlines

6 comments:

  1. LOL. Except I think my odds are slimmer than your because there's less men in the world than chicks.

    And then cut that in half by the men who are scared crapless because really, I'm quite nuts.

    So I'm back to thinking that my old age will be spent with a grey cat and a bottle of vodka.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous12/26/2007

    *awwwwww*

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous12/26/2007

    I think you're missing the opportunity to make up a few of the chicks you lost. If you tell the black chicks who won't date you because of the white chicks who would that you've done time (however short), you may be able to get that number up to 220.

    Bear Maiden, if men stopped dating women because they're insane, civilization would come to a screeching halt. Our only hope would be the results of Flavor of Love 3.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous12/27/2007

    ha. great post.

    ReplyDelete
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