Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Dear TAN: Miscegenation Sunblock

I once started a neverending interview, but now we're switching to a "Dear TAN" feature. Send your questions/letters to theassimilatednegro [at] gmail [dot] com.

In this edition: Sex with black people will be mandatory for human survival!

Dear TAN,

Hey hi.

Heard something I hadn't thought of before the other day in Anat and Physio class.... that made me think of you....

I suspect you've already thought about it, but just in case....

White folks have more or less paved the way to wrecking the earth's UV protection layer...
White folks are the in the worst position melanin-wise to survive this change.
Which leads me to two thoughts...

1. This puts dark-skinned, oppressed peoples at a beautiful advantage to inherit the scalding earth.

2. And, watch out, because we whiteys are gonna wanna breed darker.

The new sunblock for the future: unprotected sex with the melanin endowed.

I heard Bob Marley died of skin cancer of the toe... prolly because he had a white dad, and was stubborn.

Morals from a purely longrange, survival-of-the-fittest point of view:

1. If you're white, get over racism.
2. If you're black, I don't know, get racist.
3. If you're mixed, don't be stubborn if you start getting wanky growths that look like skin cancer.

Hope you're thriving.


  1. one day the world will all be a beautiful shade of tan...

    huh? that is silly, but kinda makes sense.

  2. Soul Glow12/12/2007

    i may be mistaken but i think somehow someway jheri-curl juice has also contributed to lack of ozone and global warming and all that.

  3. Rounder12/12/2007

    No one warn Vincent Gallo.

  4. They always said it was gonna be us and the roaches...

    I better start using sunblock on my palefaced baby.


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