Wednesday, February 18, 2009

How To Assimilate: Fresh Air Fund Edition

The minimum donation to the Fresh Air Fund is $35, but we all know the cost of seeing some homeys in a boat for the first time is priceless (how do you think Obama knew to sail around the Palin iceberg?).

Seriously though, cornrows on golden pond? So worth it.

distinguished non-prof The Fresh Air Fund (serving urban smog-breathing fools fresh air since 1877, son!) is in recruiting mode, looking for hosts in the northeast area. If you're relatively sane and don't have roaches all over the place, you win! Your grand prize is, like, being remembered in someone's heart forever and ever. awww.

Also, when people talk about multicultural America, and the melting pot etc. etc, you can say you helped out with that. Look at all the children so comfortable around people of all shapes, sizes, and stupidities! think of all the pretty mixed-race babies they'll make! all because of you! yay!

if you're a guilty white or black liberal (we have those now!), it's sort of a no-brainer: giving to a non-prof during our great depression? no one will be more self-righteous or holier than thou, yo.

holla if thou hear me. help the next barack, michelle, or jessica gomes get some fresh air. This has been a TAN Public Service Announcement. word.


the Fresh Air Fund
Fresh Air News Release
Donate

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous2/19/2009

    like Wu-Tang, TAN is for the kids!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks a lot it was a great help, now to assimilate is simple and easy with your guidance. Thanks

    ReplyDelete

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