Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Rough Draft: Blogging's The New Rapping

sendup of Jay-Z's "30 Something"...

MP3 File

Yeah …
You ain’t got enough traffic to f with your boy
Intergalactic son
They linking me on mars
Show you how to do this assimilated

yo, blogging’s the new rapping
n I’m so hot now (unnhh)
in the mix…
all my chicks got clout now (unnhh)
better buzz
if I drop sh*t right now
I bet its love
cause I got this net ish locked down
see you need the media
and all these blogs are the ish with media
so if media's not on your block they're online
so get your ass off the block and online
smart enough to know there’s good sites to read
and hot enough so I can get links from ‘em
I got my laptop chromed out so bloggers can’t see me
and I'll punch a n if he put drinks on it
I don’t blog on myspace
I’m talking my space
don’t gotta rhyme on stage to get your mind space
just rock your white face
start talking about something beside your crime rate
i know you like wait
these rhymes ain’t precise
plus its hov’s flow
so he ain’t really that nice
yo, you rap nerds need to chill
bloggin’s the new rapping
N I’m so hot still …

I used to let my hits sag
not giving a f*ck
baby boy now my blog’s grown up
used to email people
when I put sh*t up
baby boy now I'm all grown up

I used to sweat the gawk like that
used to leave comments like that
now I only blog for dough
got columns and such
baby boy cause I'm all grown up

rapping’s the new blogging
TAN still got flows (ohhh)
for all my hot chicks
and nappy headed hoes (nooo)
just kidding
I got respect for those
my prose can rock shows
them girls at okay know
I got more
you think
I think more
but I think
some people think
I’m overthinking the score
I’m a bully with the quotes
don’t let the flat front khaks fool you crackas
i used to smack you up at choate
that was my past
now I’m all grown up
my friends are all Caucasians
all persuasions
whatever you craving
might start an invasion
while I be somewhere eating craisins, blazin’
w/ a hot Puerto asian
catchin’ summer rays ‘n
I even bagged the Mets, cause the sex is amazin’
you bloggers fall back for real
Rapping’s the new blogging I’m so hot still ….

[TAN Audio Room]


  1. I'd put money on this being linked to by Idolator.

  2. Anonymous6/05/2007

    Oh, so that's why to don't respond to us anymore. All grown up eh.

  3. Anonymous6/05/2007

    slate did this way back in 2005:

  4. Josh Levin at Slate, author of the article you link, is name-checked in the unpublished 3rd verse.


    though he didn't do this exactly

  5. I'm a hot puerto-asian. But I don't mess with any bloggers.

  6. Anonymous6/05/2007

    If Idolator links to a black blogger in the forest, does anyone notice?

    I've been on Idolator, but never seen TAN before.

    this is hilarious though. Five people read my live journal, but you'll certainly get a link from me.


  7. Radio Raymond6/05/2007

    dude the previous post was amazing, but now this blog-rap? please stop.

  8. radio rachel6/05/2007

    I liked the previous post better as well, but I think you're all around awesome. I hate that song 30 is the new 20 and Jay-Z though (since the budweiser ads).

  9. Anonymous6/06/2007

    Yo, this shiznit is so widack, man!

    Haters hate, and haterade makes your breath smell like pee.

  10. this ish is aight. you get my vote.

  11. I didn't hear the song but I loved the damned "lyrics"! I'm adding you to my blogroll so I can check in OFTEN. Your blog appeals to my non-gossip blogger side! Cheers!

  12. what we say in the SOUTH.. when hot lyrics spit from the MOUTH???



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