The Cracka Crackdown really feels like it's getting enough legs to stand as a regular feature.
and of course, Dear Average-Sized Penis, part of the TAN Classic Edition ... and by the way I do have to take great pains to get those six hairs on my booty perfectly straight.
UPDATE: I've added the other two toons here below.
Brandon: Illustrious Illustrator
Coming Soon: TAN Toons [TAN]
TAN these are awesome!!!! you HAVE to do these regularly
ReplyDeletelove 'em TAN. you butt-naked is hilarious.
ReplyDeletefor some reason I look at the "dear penis" drawing and keep thinking your behind could have the same beard design as your face, that's funny to me.
ReplyDeleteMan, I'm like all monster jealous and shit. One of my lifetime goals is to be a cartoon character.
ReplyDeleteHH
this looks like a good combination.
ReplyDeleteHA HA HA HA!!
ReplyDeletethese are great TAN, keep 'em coming.
r.e. Your Gawker query:
ReplyDeletenice try, but there's Mr. Isaac Hayes of the notorious South Park episode. Yeah he's old and irrelevant mostly, but so are all of H-wood Scientologists these days.
I think the white guy's ass has more hair, too . . . and could TAN contemplating Combo-sharing be far behind?
ReplyDeleteI find that first cartoon extremely racially offensive. Your site should be shut down as you are obviously nothing more than an ignorant hate-monger. Shame on you, TAN..
ReplyDeleteThat being said, can I commission Brandon to draw a cartoon of me beating up some Cubans?
new to your blog, but having fun exploring here, cartoons are great
ReplyDeleteTAN the supernanny!!!
ReplyDeleteand designer distressed jim crow jeans
you crack me up. found you in reference from bits and pieces. me? I am just a poor white gal from idaho. getting some learning from this here cyber hiway. keep writing.
ReplyDeleteThese are brilliant! Would love to see a TANtoon with the borderline racist girl running her fingers through your wooliness.
ReplyDeletea lot of anons on this. what gives? people scared to stand behind their votes?
ReplyDeletebut yeah the toons are great.
I love the cartoons, and Brandon is clearly a first-class illustrator. His site is a lot of fun to see, if you haven't visited it.
ReplyDeleteMy only fear is that this and (the other) TAN-fandom might get out of hand and that we might create an entourage-shielded, paparazzi-dodging celebrity monster in the process.
On the other, hand, over-the-top fandom definitely has its advantages (for the fans if not for the performer). So I think I'll try my hand at it.
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, I always say.
So without further ado (and at the risk of furthering the creation of a celebrity monster or at least giving him the creeps), I give you:
The TAN-fan Magnum Opus
(to the tune of Carly Simon's "You're So Vain")
You walked into the B-List like you were walking onto a yacht
Your Almay mask strategically placed over your eyes
Your feet shod in flip-flops
You had one eye on the Gawker as you tossed your first bon mot
And other blogs licked their lips but knew they were just doo-doo
They were just doo-doo, and...
You're so vain, you probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain, I bet you think this blog is about you
Don't you? Don't you?
You assimilated several years ago before bloggers started to weave
Almost shot in the head while trimming your coif
And arrested for buying CDs.
But you perservered and you're a player now. Soon you'll be on the TV.
I had some dreams they were holes in the ozone, holes in the ozone and...
You're so vain, you probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain, I bet you think this blog is about you
Don't you? Don't you?
Well, I hear you went to the Worst. Sex. Ever.
And your 'shrooms naturally won
Then you climbed up the side of Conde Nast
With a manuscript taped to your bum
Well, you're where you should be all of the time
And when you're not, you're with
Some bartending muse or a literary agent
literary agent, and...
You're so vain, you probably think this blog is about you...
"they were just doo-doo..."
ReplyDeleteHA! very funny Jumper. Thanks for the little ode (i think).
I'm a fan of over-the-top fandom. At least the online variety. When you sing it outside my window, then we might have to talk ...
mmmm...nice!
ReplyDeleteThese are all nice picture he guy is very very danger .
ReplyDelete