Thursday, October 05, 2006

And Then Kafka Was Like, "Dude, Back Off Already!!"

Dragon asks a good question, how many roaches until you "have roaches?"

I see maybe 5-6 roaches a year in my apartment. I'd say i don't have roaches.

Taj mentions, "a roach or two every few days." I'd say that's definitely having roaches.


I think I'd settle for a roach or two a month means you got them. So let's call it at ten a year or less, and you get roach-free certification.

Girls could definitely start checking if your roach-free certification card is current. Which means some guys are gonna have to borrow their boys' card, cause their crib is straight infested. On some don't even turn on the lights after sunset ish.

10 or less and you are roach-free certified. Yes?


  1. In Hong Kong, as long as one is not big enough to overtake you, you are cockroach free.

  2. Wishful thinking! Don't they say that for every one vermin-creature you see, there are, like, 100 more hiding in the walls? Yeah. Get yourself a bedbug infestation, too, and you'll never get laid again.

    I have never seen a roach in my building in 13 years. *knocking on wood and hoping not to disturb the centipedes and spiders*

  3. Anonymous10/05/2006

    I need to borrow someone's roach free certification card. my situation is not good.
    wait, there goes another one AGGGHHH!

  4. I like the headline. The Metamorphosis is one of my faves.

    I don't like roaches though. And have seen none, surely the truest test of "not having" them.

  5. I used to have a place with roaches. One of the worst things an apartment can have. i'd rather leaks and drunk people in the hallways any day. but i do take roaches over rats, or mice.

  6. The 10-or-less rule works for New York only. In other places, probably five would do it.

    When I lived in Brooklyn I "had" roaches. I opened the refrigerator one day and there was a roach IN THE REFRIGERATOR. Just chillin, checking out the spread. Those fools made themselves comfortable.

  7. In apartment buldings and such, (or any time you share walls with others) 10 sounds reasonable. In a house with space between it and other houses, one means you have roaches, or soon will.

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