Go Ahead, Steal My Identity. Please.

so someone told me I should be careful with how much personal information I disclose on the internet. Which you can't really argue with as sound advice. But I was wondering if they were concerned about the apparent epidemic of identity theft spreading across the country.

Because I'm not.

Quite frankly, things haven't taken off the way I'd like. So I wouldn't mind resetting the 'ol identity odometer . Therefore if any identity thieves are lurking about figuring out how to become The Assimilated Negro, let me help you out:

First Name: Broke

Last Name: Negro

Middle Name: Ass

SS# : 021 – 47 – 6402

Amount owed in loans - $500000000000000000000000000000000

Amount of revenue currently being contributed - $00000000000000000000000000.01

# of current friends: 0

# of former friends who are owed money: 427000000000000000000000000000000

# of bounced checks in the state of Virginia: 5,269


I think this can get you on your way.

I have a street team handing out flyers and t-shirts with my social and other key information. Please use it yourself, or forward it on to your friendly neighborhood identity thief.

Also, in the interest of full disclosure, I should mention that debt collectors are actually writing this blog for me because I told them on the phone that my words are the only thing I own.

When I asked them for a break, they told me to watch this informative video.

So go ahead, please steal my identity. I dare you.

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