Thursday, March 22, 2007

FutureSex/Love Mating Ritual

Hi, my name is sex

Hi, my name is love

Nice to meet you love

Nice to meet you sex

So, love, what do you do for a living?

Oh, I work at this place that helps me get in position to have a loving family. I will have children that propagate our species you know.

Yes, I do know. I personally work at this place that helps me get sex. My having sex helps propagate the species also. But you know this already. Heheh.

Heheh. Yeah.

So I’m incredibly strong. My job only hires the strongest of people.

Oh really? That’s cool. I love strong guys.

I’m also very intelligent. Would you like me to say something very intelligent?

No, no, that’s ok. I can tell from your overall disposition and approach that you are very smart. I love intelligent guys.

Are you sure you don’t want me to prove my intelligence? Here, let me do it anyways. Cause everyone says they’re intelligent, but I want to show I’m really intelligent. Here, what do you think of this: [intelligent statement, preferably humorous since humor demonstrates intelligence, or at least that’s what we think].

Oh wow. That was VERY intelligent. And also kind of funny. Haha. I love intelligent and funny people.


I knew you would. Sex?

No thanks. Love?

Mmmm, not right now. So, um, what do you do when you’re not working?

Oh, I don’t know. I go out to movies and museums. Jog around the park. Go for a drink with my lovely friends. Nothing abnormal.

Huh. That’s funny. I love movies. And I can tolerate a museum with the best of them. Maybe we should have sex?

Well I most enjoy going to the movies or museum with someone I love, you know?

Yeah, me too!! I feel like we may be talking about the same thing. Maybe love and sex mean the same thing, have you considered that?

Indeed, I have considered that! I actually thought about it the last time I talked to a strong, intelligent, and funny person like yourself. Ha. Just letting you know, I know how this game works.

Game? Ha, what game? I’m just trying to talk to someone about love-sex. I keep saying sex, and you keep saying love, but it translates the same for all intents and purposes, right?

NO! Love means love. Sex means sex. That’s why they’re two separate words. Duh.

Haha. Touché love, touché.

Haha

So, do you want to do something? What do you think about sex?

Hmmm, I don’t know. Sex is cool, but I prefer love.

Are you sure sex and love are not the same thing?

YES!

Hmmm, well maybe we can have sex until love develops?

Hmmm, I’m not positive, but I don’t think that’s how love works. I’m a product of sex, technically, but really I’m a product of love. You know what I mean?

Hmmm, not exactly.

Well, no matter, I have the vagina. You can’t have sex without one, right?

Yes, you are correct love. Ok. It seems you have the upper-hand here. Let me cut to the chase. How could I get you to partake with some of that there vagina?


I don’t know. Obviously I’m all about love, so maybe if you showcased a little of that it might help your cause.

Ok. I’m into that. What do I do?

I don’t know. It’s up to you. Love is personal and subjective, that’s why it’s so special.

Hmmm. But I think love and sex are the same, so how does that work? If I think love is sex, then doesn’t that mean you should have sex?

Hmmm. I’m a little confused, but I know the answer is NO!

Now you’re just being difficult.

Love is difficult.

Sex is not difficult.

Exactly.

I’m confused.

Me too.

Why don’t we just have sex?

Why don’t we just make love?

OK

OK

OK

7 comments:

  1. Anonymous3/22/2007

    Brilliant. Just brilliant. One interpretation question: are you suggestion that "love" is not intelligent but "sex" is? Since "love" apparently has the vagina, not sure I'm liking the inference. IJS...But on the other hand, maybe "sex" just good at putting on the act since that what "love" seems to like? Ack. TAN, you might not be helping your team right now.

    Oh, and BTW, what those two cats are doing isn't sex, it's status and dominance behavior. Neutered boy cats will do that and it's pretty funny to see if you think they're trying to perform something that they don't have the equipment to do.

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  2. too deep star. just.too.deep. this was a great post, made even better by the pictures of animals boning. enough said.

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  3. Never, ever post photos like this again. You can't go from posting pics of Naomi's nip to this. It's not right.

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  4. The story was funny and the comments are funny. A good time is being had by all. Yeah that was so a Naomi nip pick Mist. I just wasn't sure, because the hair was throwing me off. LOL. Poor T.A.N you really need to get some. :-(

    Ms. Denva

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  5. I need to get some what? ... love? I agree.

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  6. T.A.N,

    Love, sex same thing right? Either way you will feel good LOL.

    Ms. D

    ReplyDelete

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