Map Seat

The map seat sucks for both parties. Anyone sitting there is annoyed at map checkers, any map checker is self-consciously aware of this. Here's a typical NYC exchange:

LOST moves in to look at the map, MAP SEAT doesn't take kindly. It might be helpful to know MAP SEAT is white, LOST is black.
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Map Seat – yo son, do you need to get so close?? You blind or something? Why don’t you back it up a little bit.

Lost – sorry, but um, I’m just trying to figure out where I’m going.

MS – YO SON!! Your breath is too hot to be talking all close to me like this. Play like Onyx and bacdafucup!!

L – Onyx? Look ... ok, I’m backing up. There’s no need to be confrontational here, I just want to figure out directions.

MS - where you trying to go?

L - Uh, well it’s in Brooklyn, but I’d really prefer to jus—

MS – listen, I know Brooklyn. Where you trying to go?

L - [pause] Um, Park Slope I think ... I have to get off at Atlantic.

MS - I should have figured a brother like you to live out in Park Slope.

L - ...

MS - I'll give you a heads up when your stop is coming up.

L - Can I just look at the map? Please. Is it your map?

MS - Is it my map? [looks around at no one in particular] No, it’s not my map, is it your map?

L - No … but I just want to look so I can know where I'm going.

MS - I'm getting off at Union, it's one stop after. I'll let you know. Don't worry.

L - [mood: annoyed] Fine. Whatever. How many stops is it?

MS - [looks at map] I don't know, six or seven stops.

L - What's the stop before mine?

MS - I don't know, but I'll let you know before we get into Brooklyn.

L - Thanks.

MS - No problem.

L - It would have been easier to just let me look, you know.

MS - Maybe. But your breath is really hot.

L - Really?

MS - Yeah.

L - That sucks, I'm going to a party where my ex-girlfriend is going to be.

MS - Here son, use some of my Burt's Peppermint Drops. [takes out drops]

L - Thanks. [takes drops] Wow, these are good.

MS - Yeah. They still only cover up the problem. You have something more serious going on I think. You have health insurance?

L - Uh ... no?

MS - Actually, this is my stop here. It's all yours. Later.