Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Presidential Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Be afraid minorities and poor people, be very very afraid. The buzz building around Rudy Giuliani running for president has reached critical mass, and you should be extremely concerned.

Rudy has way more than enough star power and political savvy to totally muck up what should be an election year that's primed for a Democratic victory. He's been Knighted, a Time Person of the Year, and always has the 9/11 Ace up his sleeve. He's got a track record and attitude that would totally capitalize on "George Bush With A Brain" positioning. And as we see in the pic, he's also got quotes on "leadership" already planted on Starbucks cups across America. Who knew the proceeds from your latte were going to fund the GOP election campaign?

Rudy's even got a little dirt in his past to give him that Bill Clinton man-of-the-people panache. This is all very troubling.

Part of the optimism with Hillary and Obama was based on timeliness. Their candidacy was aligning right with an enormous void of leadership, such that even those who might otherwise be resistant to change could look past the negro or female thing just to get a competent life form in the position of command. This was supposed to be the case with Kerry, and he proved to be competent, just not a life form. But now everyone knows we were duped and suckered AGAIN, so what they hey, bring on the alternative candidates. Anything but the status quo. But Rudy's presence now casts a huge shadow on the festivities. He has some warts, but with Hillary and Obama splitting all of the "vote for change" crowd, a white man as well decorated as he is is extremely dangerous. He's like The Death Star for the Republican empire.

Thinking about the potential matchups: I think I prefer Obama v. Rudy over Hillary v. Rudy. Before Giuliani stepped in I was choosing Hillary's seniority over Obama, but somehow with Rudy in the mix I think the gender thing is a disadvantage. It's easier to be subtly sexist than subtly racist. Plus 'Liani's just ruthless. If you're mixing it up with him you want to send the women and children home, cause it might get nasty out. Obama might be a little too much of a punk as well, but I'd bet on him breaking out the brass knuckles before Lady Clinton. Although, Lady Clinton does have Republican Kryptonite in the form of her husband. So it's a tough call. Jury's still out I guess. Really Bill Clinton should just be made King of the United States, but I guess that's not an option.

Rudy vs. Hillary would be pretty crazy actually, that would probably be the most entertaining election campaign.

Either way you add it up though, us Ewoks, Chewbaccas, and Princess Leias should be afraid of Rudy. Very, very afraid.

14 comments:

  1. thanks for the links. kerik hurts, but it's far enough removed that i don't think it's a big deal anymore.

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  2. Anonymous2/07/2007

    Then again, there's the group that thinks Rudy isn't conservative enough, and with all these fundie wingnuts still jockeying for power, they might not cotton to someone who's too much like Clinton.

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  3. Anonymous2/07/2007

    Is everyone forgetting the senatorial race, against Hillary, Rudy had to bow out of back in 2000?

    Movie Trailer Voice:
    Rudy v. Hillary '08: Cancer stopped him last time but now he's mad.
    [cue action movie music and explosions]

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  4. Anonymous2/07/2007

    Rudy would cause a problem in the general, but there is no way a twice-divorced, cross-dressing, opera-loving dandy with gay roommates gets through the primary season. The real threat is McCain. He's an arch-conservative who is inexplicably popular with liberals and independents and he's the perfect kind of maverick for the GOP -- the guy who claims to be a two-fisted, straight-talking rebel yet somehow always toes the party line.

    I've used up all the hyphens on my computer

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  5. *Adorns hardhat* T.A.N I got my shovel and I am also blasting away some of this rock in the rocky mountains for a nice hide out. If this doesn't work, I hear Tahiti is nice any time of year.

    Seriously though, this is scary.

    In work boots and a hard hat,

    Ms. Denva

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  6. Anonymous2/08/2007

    Oh, being married to an adulterer is one thing; being a guy who moved your mistress into the official residence is another. The hypocrisy factor would be enormous but it would pretty nullify all the crap that could be thrown about morality.

    "Republican Kryponite", heh, heh. Hillary's theme song should be that Spin Doctors refrain (...I got a pocket full of..."

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  7. Anonymous2/08/2007

    Does anyone else realize that Hilary and Obama both are ridiculously underqualified to be president? Sure Obama is the trendy vote and Hilary is loved by your mom, but Bill Richardson is a much better candidate for the Democrats. Look him up, TAN, besides his pro death penalty stance he's a pretty good contender.

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  8. Anonymous2/08/2007

    I've never felt so strong about an upcoming election, yeah...that's assuming there will even be one with martial law instituted for war with Iran, but if there is one I really really really want Obama to win.
    I have issues with Hillary's relationship with Rupert Murdoch.
    She's like a neocon in disguise.
    Either way, I don't think I'll vote because I'll probably have left the country before then.
    Peace!

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  9. Anonymous2/08/2007

    Where would he put the homeless people if he were president? Puerto Rico, probably.

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  10. Raincoaster,

    Obama is actually a man of the people and very grassroots. I am sure he would come up with a more equitable solution than Puerto Rico. You might want to look up his history.

    5280 Princess,

    Ms. Denva

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  11. Raincoaster,

    Obama is actually a man of the people and very grassroots. I am sure he would come up with a more equitable solution than Puerto Rico. You might want to look up his history.

    5280 Princess,

    Ms. Denva

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  12. Call me crazy, but I'm liking what John Edwards has to say. Yes, he's white...and male...but I can't help lovin' dat man (and his health-care policy proposals).

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