There are all sorts of Negro Assimilation ProgramS (NAPS). Some negroes want to go into finance. Some remain traditionalist, and prefer to emulate the caucasian mainstream by robbing them of their ipods and corduroy blazers and then, you know, using those items later to lure unsuspecting caucasianistas into their web of macabre miscegenation.
But if you're on the Writer's Track, no assimilation program is complete without a clip from the Mecca of demonstrably Caucasian humor: McSweeney's.
Today I was fortunate enough to earn my Eggers Stripes and get my "Black History Month: An Objective Perspective" placed in the hallowed halls. So my caucasian peeps, if you're so inclined, feel free to pour a little latte for your boy.
What tickles me most is the byline: The Assimilated Negro. Venerable literary institutions can be picky with that sometimes, so I will always love them for respecting the three little words that are destined to
And look ma, I didn't even use the word "negro."
Black History Month: An Objective Perspective [McSweeney's]